Happy Birthday, to you!
Happy Birthday, to you!
Happy Birthday you ugly little bastard,
Happy Birthday to YOU!
Yep, little baby Iraqwar is turning five today and you can just bet his Momma George and Papa Dick are as proud as they can be. And how he’s grown! My goodness, half a trillion dollars, four thousand soldiers, and maybe half a million civilians down his sucking little gullet (I’ve lost count – we don’t do pablum counts (LOL)!)
I noticed that Mommy was up on stage yesterday, celebrating her love for little Iraqwar to the whole world. It’s remarkable to see how a mother can love even such an ugly, fat, slathering little monster even such as this – what a species we are! Yes, defensive to the end she is for her kid:
“The successes we are seeing in Iraq are undeniable, yet some in Washington still call for retreat,” the president said. “War critics can no longer credibly argue that we are losing in Iraq, so now they argue the war costs too much. In recent months, we have heard exaggerated estimates of the costs of this war.
Exaggerated, indeed! Three trillion dollars, can you imagine? But that was just blather from some egghead economist that won a Noble prize. Mommy, the legacy C student, knows much better than to believe such foolishness. No, baby is doing just fine, even if he isn’t exactly paying his way like we all thought he might by now.
He might be hungry, but he’s precocious, and he’s already showing signs that he’s learning to make his own way in the world. I’ll just bet that when Mommy and Daddy retire in November we’ll find that little Iraqwar will have learned to drive all by himself and will be around for a good long time – even if nice old Uncle John doesn’t move in. Imagine that – driving all by himself at only five! I’ll bet he’ll even drive better than Mommy, especially when she’s had a little too much sneezing powder.
Happy birthday little guy – here’s hoping for many more good years for you.
And for us.
The US Defense Industry
PS – FearfulRepublican and RightWingChristian wanted to send their regards, but they appear to be laying low right now. Don’t worry dear, they love you very much and Uncle John is going to do his best to bring them out to visit you over the coming few months.
PPS – We know that, just like Mommy, Baby gets whatever he wants, but is there any way that you can, you know, eat just a little less for the next six months or so?